When I discovered I was pregnant, I was not new to motherhood. I was 26 years old and already parenting my 2 1/2-year-old son, Jack. I wanted more children, and was actually missing having a baby in the house.
The day I found out, I hadn’t even missed that time of the month, but something in me told me to test. In my gut, I knew. The line was so faint I could barely see it, but oh, it was there.
I was a mix of so many emotions.
Happiness, because I knew how much I loved Jack; fear, because I didn’t know how I was going to take care of the new baby; and anger, at myself for allowing it to happen. Continue reading →
This guest post is by Jennifer Dance, an adoptive mother.
It had been five years into our struggle with infertility so my husband I were elated when we found out we had been chosen by an expectant parent for consideration as adoptive parents.
In preparation for our upcoming adoption we were required by our adoption agency to attend a birth mother panel.
We went into the panel feeling very uncomfortable with the term “open adoption.” We had already decided a closed adoption would be best for us but we left the panel two completely different people.
It was so eye-opening and heartwarming to hear the stories of these courageous and selfless birth mothers. They sacrificed so much in order to provide a better life for their children. Continue reading →
This guest post is by Amanda Grant, founder of USAdopt.
One of the most frequent mistakes people make when they are in the early days of their adoption journey is to choose the wrong agency or attorney – one that is not a match for their personal adoption objectives.
This mistake can cost you precious time, money (usually not refundable) and unnecessary stress. The good news is that it’s one of the easiest problems to avoid.
Choosing the right agency or attorney the first time will pave the way for the most positive and successful adoption experience you can have.
I’ve divided the initial part of the process to find the right agency or attorney into three steps. Continue reading →
My voice is confident and taken without judgement. I am surrounded by a group of women who have been in my shoes before. I feel safe here in a room filled with complete strangers.
I have been public speaking for some time now, but somehow this room always feels different.
I stand taller, but also allow my walls to be broken down more than usual. Their tear-filled eyes meet mine and I know without doubt my words could be their words. We have all felt grief, pain, loss and have made a life-changing decision.
Our outward appearance would give you no hint that we had anything particular in common. However, our hearts are tied together. We are all here to find peace, friendship, worth, courage and hope. Continue reading →
This guest post is by Virginia Castleman, an adoptee and author.
Whether you are interested in adoption or fostering, or you yourself are adopted, or you know someone who’s adopted, the question of open versus closed adoptions may come up.
I fall into the “adopted” category and the state I was adopted in (Michigan) has closed adoption laws. In closed adoptions, the birth parents “give up” all connection with the child, so there’s no calling their child, sending gifts, or getting updates from the adoptive parents.
Closed adoptions are legally enforceable, and believe me, there’s no getting around the laws.
Open adoptions, on the other hand, have more options. Birth parents, for instance, may be allowed to visit the child, send presents, correspond with him or her, and keep channels “open”.
Children in open adoptions have access to health information, and for teens and women hesitant to give up their child, this option feels less threatening. Open adoption is not legally enforceable, so the adoptive parents can cut off communication. Continue reading →
Ten years ago, when I was 18, I found myself pregnant with the first person I’d ever been intimate with. The idea of adoption was an initial thought, but nothing I took seriously until I was eight months along.
I didn’t think that today, a decade later, I would be sharing my story as a birth mother. How grateful I am to be able to hold that title and share what is dear to my heart.
I am so grateful for adoption. I love being able to support and share my love for adoption, and to be able to be an advocate for it in its entirety.
When I placed my son, there were specific guidelines which needed to be followed after placement.The first three months after placement I received pictures and a letter once week.
At the three month mark, up to the six months, I received pictures and a letter once every two week. There were no phone calls, no texts, no email exchanged. There were also no personal addresses exchanged. Continue reading →
Private domestic adoption poses its own unique set of challenges, and financing is definitely one of them.
For several years now I’ve been helping adoptive families find and utilize the adoption financing options which best fits their needs.
There are four basic ways to fund your adoption: personal funds, fundraising, grants and loans.
Personal assets and funds
Most people I know of do not have 20K-40K sitting around just waiting in an adoption account. However, you may have more valuables than you realize. “Think outside the bank”.
When I watch Antiques Roadshow, I am always stunned by the valuables people find or have been given to them by someone else. You just never know what you’ll find if you start looking really hard. “What can I sell?” Why not honor your loved one by using funds from a family heirloom to bring your child home? This will be a living and lasting legacy! Continue reading →