8 Things Not To Say To A Woman Who Has Just Placed Her Baby For Adoption

More than half of all pregnancies today are unplanned, but only a small percentage of them—less than 3 percent–result in an adoption placement.

Because of that, there are still many misconceptions surrounding women who chose adoption for their baby and confusion about how they feel immediately after placing.

Even birthmothers—the term given to women who create an adoption plan for her child—have a hard time coming to terms with their decision and struggle with a variety of conflicting emotions ranging from anger and guilt to excitement and confusion.

Feeling that their life is out of control, many will take a step back and withdraw from society, which only adds to their feelings of loneliness, alienation and confusion.

If you know a woman who has recently placed, you may want to comfort her. By all means, do. She can use all the help and support she can get.

Just make sure that do you it sensitively and avoid making assumptions about her or her decision by saying any of these hurtful comments. Continue reading

22 Things You Wanted To Know About Giving Up Your Baby For Adoption But Were Afraid To Ask

If you’re pregnant and thinking of giving up your baby for adoption, you probably have countless questions and not a lot of answers.

We’ll try to answer some of the most basic questions here.

But before we do, we want to point out that you’re not “giving up” your baby.

Adoption is a difficult decision but it’s a loving one, too.

Today, with open adoption, women choose placement not because they want to get rid of their child or don’t want anything to do with them.

They do it because they love their child so much that they believe that finding an adoptive family is the best decision, given their circumstances at the time.

But that’s for you to decide. Continue reading

10 Things A Pregnant Woman With An Adoption Plan Needs To Stop Telling Herself

When things get tough, we tend to be our own worst enemy.

Instead of moving forward and looking for solutions, we dwell on our problems and blame ourselves. 

If you’re facing an unplanned pregnancy and considering adoption for your baby, you may find yourself in this predicament.

From questioning whether you’re a good person to worrying about how your parents will react to your decision, it’s easy to focus on the negative.

Thing is, the only person who can get you out of your funk is the one who got you into it: you.

Here are 10 negative thoughts you need to banish from your mind right now as you consider adoption for your baby. Continue reading

How Do You Know If The Adoptive Parents Will Keep Their Promises?

It’s the biggest fear faced by every expectant mother who chooses adoptive parents for her baby: How do I know if they’ll keep their promises?

Creating an adoption plan is probably the most difficult thing you’ll ever do.

With no road map or role models to fall back on, you may find yourself second-guessing yourself every step of the way.

And finding parents to raise your baby is one of the most unknowable parts of the process.

For some, choosing an an adoptive family before placement helps put their mind at ease and validates their decision.

But for others, it raises a set of new unanswered questions.

How do I know if the couple will honor their word? How do I know they won’t go back on their promise and close down the adoption? Is there anything I can do now that will guarantee that I have a good relationship with them in the long run? Continue reading