This guest post is by Teresa Leet, a birthmother.
I was not your “stereotypical” unplanned pregnant mom. I was a career mom in my late thirties, raising three girls on my own, going through the throes of a second failed marriage when we decided to give reconciliation a shot.
It did not stick! I then discovered I was pregnant. I was taking precautions too!
I asked my mom and the father of the baby (soon to be ex-husband) for advice and they both told me I needed to abort.
“I couldn’t bring this child into my situation,“ and “I guess you just want me to hand over my whole paycheck!” were their respective responses.
I called a friend who was a God-fearing woman and she gently suggested “adoption.” I practically hung up on her!
How dare she suggest something so cruel, and I was a professional woman in contact with 23 direct reports daily, not to mention clients by the droves.
How was I going to carry a child for nine months, then explain why I wasn’t parenting the child? The judgement, the looks, the disappointment of many and my three girls; how was I going to explain this to them?
Nope, the advice from mom and the father made perfect sense. I did not have the emotional capacity to parent another child.
I scheduled the abortion. After all, it was the best thing for everyone right? ( well, except the small matter of murdering the child I was carrying).
On the way to the clinic, which is now shut down, I had a breakdown and clearly heard the voice of God speaking to me and telling me he had plans for my/his child.
I turned around and allowed that peaceful voice to lead. I was still very upset BUT trusted the One who changed my heart.
At my doctor appointment confirming the pregnancy ( because the 8 pregnancy tests I took t home could be wrong) I asked the nurse if she had any information for a mom-to-be considering an adoption plan.
She knew of a nurse’s daughter who had two failed in-vitro attempts and was considering adoption. I gave the nurse my number and the Lord worked his miracle from there.
We chose an open adoption and I get frequent updates on how she and her sister are doing. We have exchanged a few letters and have even met in person once.
Today “Harley” is thriving and will be 15 this summer. Shortly after she was adopted, the parents were able to adopt another little girl!
Blessings were bountiful from the obedience displayed for all of us!
I have been invited to speak publicly at life events and created/hosted a training seminar for crisis pregnancy counselors to equip them on how to speak about adoption to their clients without alienating them.
My current husband and I enjoy sharing our testimonies, especially since the man is usually forgotten when there is a crisis pregnancy.
They matter too is the message my husband shares. What the mother decides impacts more than just the mother and the baby.
Considering my incredibly beautiful experience with an open adoption; my way of paying it forward is educating others on the options with an unplanned pregnancy and the options with an adoption plan.
I will be writing a book and pray it will be well read to encourage and help spread the loving option of adoption.
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