Get Talking About Adoption With Oscar-Nominated Movies

This guest post is by Addison Cooper of Adoption at the Movies

Oscar Award - Hyatt Regency Sha TinOn Sunday March 2, Ellen DeGeneres will be hosting the 86th Academy Awards. Two dozen or so little statues will be given to the filmmakers who have achieved greatness this year.

Two of the nominated films have strong adoption themes.

Philomena, nominated for Best Picture, highlights the journey of sixty-something Philomena Lee. As a teenager, Philomena gave birth in an Irish nursery.

Her son was adopted, and she kept his existence a secret for much of her life. Now, on the occasion of his fiftieth birthday, she begins to search for him.

There are many good and recent films which show adoptees uncovering their own histories – The Invisible Red Thread (2012), Somewhere Between (2011), and Closure (2013) – are three of them.

Philomena is interesting because it’s the story of a birth parent trying to uncover the history of her adoption. Philomena particularly challenges the harmful stereotypes which have reinforced the idea of closed adoptions as normative and ideal. Continue reading

It Takes Love—And Work—To Create An Interracial Adoptive Family

This guest post is by Marlene Fine and Fern Johnson, adoptive parents and authors.

interracial-familyWe are the white adoptive parents of two African American sons, both adopted when they were infants and who are now in their 20s.

Our experience as white mothers of children of color has taught us much about the importance of helping children develop a healthy racial and/or ethnic identity.

White adoptive parents of children of color from outside the U.S. are often encouraged to travel to their adopted child’s country of birth or to enroll their child in language or cultural classes.  These are important to both the adopted child and the adopted parents and we strongly endorse them.

But there’s much more to be done.  Continue reading

16 Things Adopting Parents Want An Expectant Mother Considering Adoption To Know

adopting-parentsAs adopting parents, we know this is a difficult time for you.

And while we don’t understand everything you’re going through, we do have a sense of some of the challenges you may be facing as you consider an adoption plan for your baby.

In many ways, we’re on the other side of the same coin.

Whereas you’re thinking of placing your baby for adoption, we would love nothing better than to adopt a baby through adoption.

And like you, we want only the best for your child.

So while it may seem strange to hear this from us, people you don’t know and have never met, we want you to know that we already love you and your child more than words can say. Continue reading

Why Adoption Fundraising Is Necessary For Adopting Parents

This guest post is by Jenny Lotz, an adoptive mother and blogger

jenny-lotz-adoption-fundraisingA lot of people don’t understand adoption, much less adoption fundraising.

They wonder why adoptive parents expect others to foot the bill to “buy” them a child and make them happy.

They wonder why it’s so expensive.

They wonder why people don’t just give money to birth moms to help them raise the amount of money needed to raise their own child.

They wonder why adoptive parents can’t just save and pay the money all by themselves.

But all of those wonderings are shrouded in misunderstanding. Continue reading

What Open Adoption Means To Our Adoptive And Birth Family

This guest post is by Jody Cantrell Dyer, an adoptive parent and author.

jodyToday, Valentine’s Day, I turn the “Big 4-0.”

I expect I’ll mark the occasion with chocolate and reflection. Like most women, I’ll question, analyze, and remember big decisions in my life in great detail.

One decision I made early in 2010 was to open my heart and mind to open adoption. That decision created a new dynamic and much bigger story for many.

Our open adoption holds significant meaning— not just to me, but to my entire family and my child’s birth family.

What open adoption means to us:

I have two sons, Scott, who is adopted, and Houston, who is biological.

Scotty is 3 1/2 years old. For Scotty, open adoption means that his parents were able to meet him the day he was born.  Continue reading

Why I Chose A Forever Family To Adopt My Baby

This guest post is by Elizabeth, a birthmother.

birthmother-storyTwo years ago, when I was 13, I found out I was pregnant.  I knew that at my age I would not have been able to give my baby the care she needed, whatever she wanted, and everything she deserved. I wanted her to have a forever family.

I wanted her to have a father that loved her more than anything. Something that without placing her, I wouldn’t have been able to give her myself. I felt like open adoption was the best decision for everyone involved.

I’d seen and heard stories of adoptees trying to find their birth-moms and I understood how hard that would have been. I wanted to watch my baby grow, develop and to have a relationship with her. Continue reading

How I Became A Birth Grandmother And Learned The True Meaning Of Open Adoption

This guest post is by Janet, a birth grandmother and blogger. 

birth-grandmother-with-babyWhen my 19-year-old, unmarried daughter came to my husband and I, and told us she was pregnant, we were understandably upset. Even though I had been worried about her for a long time, I was still unprepared to hear this news. She then told us that she had already decided that she was going to choose adoption.

We were immediately supportive, and told her we loved her and would support her decision and help her anyway we could. I couldn’t sleep that night thinking of everything she was about to face. There were many more sleepless nights to come. Continue reading

Why An Adoption Support System Is Vital For All Members of the Triad

This guest post is by Jessalyn Bills from Birthmothers4Adoption

adoption-supportAdoption for any member of the triad is emotionally exhausting. It can be incredibly hard to navigate all the bits and pieces.

An adoptive couple has to deal with their infertility/sterility/or any other problem that may prevent them from bearing a child of their own.

They have to raise enough money. They have to sit through hours of paperwork, fine tuning profiles, and making sure every last detail is taken care of.

They then have the agonizing wait hoping they get chosen by birth parents to be placed with. After that they have to navigate post placement which could include bonding, more paperwork, open adoption, questions, and others.

A birthmother has to deal with carrying a child for nine months only to place that child with a couple forever. They look through profiles, sit through meetings, doctor appointments, physical body changes, and public opinion from all sides of the matter. Continue reading