This guest post is by Rachel Garlinghouse, an adoptive parent and author.
1. She’s cocooning.
Children who were adopted, whether at birth or an older age, need time and space to bond with their new parents. Likewise, the parents need to bond with the child.
Though everyone is banging on the proverbial door to greet the new child, the family needs time just to be. Sometimes this is out of absolute necessity: a child who is withdrawing from drugs, a child who has faced neglect or abuse, a child who has special needs.
This guest post is by Daisy Finn, an adoptive mother.
Four years ago my husband and I became parents. We adopted a baby.
The reason we did it was quite common—inability to have kids of our own.
Back then the diagnosis sounded like a curse and it seemed like our lives had stopped, but we managed to find a solution—adoption.
We didn’t need much time to come up with this decision. We’d been planning to become parents for years, read tons of literature, and attended countless courses for future families.
Our journey as future adoptive parents started right after we went over the terrifying diagnosis.
The process didn’t take as long as we expected.
Agencies estimate a six-to-eight month wait time, but four months after signing the papers we were already matched and waiting for the birthmother to give birth.
We’d spent a lot of time with this woman. I could even say we’d became friends.
Even though the adoption was transracial, we’d never felt any discomfort nor experienced misunderstandings with our son’s birthmother.
When they cracked them open, their reactions were incredible. I wish I would have recorded them.
My husband’s mom squealed with joy, and my mother cried. My husband’s grandma had the best reaction of all.
She asked what was the birthmother’s name. I wanted to cry because someone had cared to ask. It turns out the birthmother’s name was the same as her grandmother’s, something we all took as a good omen. Continue reading →
