This guest post is by Rachel Jacobs, a birthmother.
Open adoption? I had never heard about it until I was six weeks pregnant with my son back in 2014.
All I knew about adoption was that there were closed adoptions where the mother never saw her child or had to search for him many years after placement.
I knew I didn’t want to do that. I wanted to be easy to find in case my son ever had questions that only I could answer.
Honestly, when I discovered I was pregnant my first thought wasn’t adoption. It was abortion.
And yet deep down I knew I couldn’t go through with it because I had grown up in a baptist household. Also, I was totally against killing an innocent child and wanted to give a child a reason to live.
I love children, and because of that I started blaming myself for my unplanned pregnancy.
I felt guilty and all these negative thoughts wracked my brain, including the fear that my parents were going to kill me.
But that changed when my counselor told me “it takes two to tango.” After that, I realized that I shouldn’t blame myself for everything that had happened. A guy was involved and he was partly responsible too.
At the time, I was living at home and knew that I wasn’t financially or mentally ready to be a single mom.
I was lucky because even after I told my family about my pregnancy, they continued to love me and gave me all the support they possibly could. Continue reading →
“Help us find a special birthmother for adoption by RTing this. #birthmother #birthmom #adoption #openadoption #adopt #baby #adoptiveparents”
If you’ve spent any time on the social media, chances are you’ve come across posts similar to this and others like: “Make our adoption dream come true. If you’re pregnant, call us now. All expenses paid.”
At first glance, these messages by waiting adoptive parents may seem perfectly fine.
But if you want to find an adoption match online, you’ll need to take a different approach using different wording and a different tone.